Like a Multiverse on Fire
by 800 words of heaven
Summary: "Conflicted interests" is one way you could describe Sirius Black and Millie White's relationship. But when Sirius manages to convince Millie into one of his hare-brained schemes, the coming clash will ensure that senior year at Hogwarts College of Magical Arts won't be what either of them expected. A (Magic) College AU
1. Spider

One minute Millie White was drooling peacefully over her advanced Arithmancy textbook, her "quick study break" having morphed into an impromptu powernap; the next she was being rudely jerked awake by a terrified yelp followed in quick succession by a dull thud and a loud and vehement string of swearwords.

She frowned. It seemed as if her neighbour was up to his usual shenanigans.

Normally, she didn't mind. The walls were thin, and now a senior at Hogwarts College of Magical Arts, she was quite immune to the sounds that filtered through the thin walls of the dormitories. Although, one would think that with a little soundproofing charm, all would be fixed. Alas, it was but one of the many charms that refused to stick to the ancient walls of the dorm rooms.

Still frowning, she returned to her Arithmancy textbook, hoping that her nap would somehow make the tiny text a little less blurry and a little more comprehensible. On any other night, musing about her rather mysterious neighbour's early morning adventures would've been amusing, but midterms were looming and not even her tall, dark and handsome neighbour would stop her from maintaining her 4.0 GPA.

Besides, he'd probably just stumbled into his bedside table after a late night out spent partying and drinking. At least, that's what she assumed Sirius Black did during his evening hours. Despite living in Gryffindor Hall for the past three years, and now been neighbours for almost two months, Millie knew very little about Sirius Black.

Of course, she knew _of_ him. _Everyone_ knew of Sirius Black and his friends. Hogwarts was too small to boast a proper fraternity, but if they ever had one, the Marauders would be declared co-presidents without any competition.

Millie preferred to keep herself to herself for the most part, and thus avoided him and that crowd on principle. But, they were neighbours, and as neighbours, had exchanged polite and vaguely friendly greetings in passing.

She shook her head to rid herself of all thoughts of Sirius Black and his frat boy ways, returning her attention to the pages in front of her.

But she was interrupted _once again_ , this time by a persistent knocking on her door. Sighing, she debated whether or not to answer it. It _was_ three-o-clock in the morning after all. What business did anyone have banging down on her door at such an hour?

Then again, whoever _was_ at the door must have very good reason to be there. So she got up, shoving her bare feet into a pair of tennis shoes lying near her bed, and stomped the short distance to the front of the room.

Not bothering to check who it was, she swung the door open with more force than necessarily required, and said "What?" at the person who dared disturb her revision at such an ungodly hour.

The somewhat startled face of Sirius Black looked back at her. His fist was still raised in preparation of his next volley of knocks, his hair was beyond dishevelled, and his startling grey eyes stared back at her scowl with an almost unnerving intensity.

Oh, and he was only wearing a towel around his waist.

At this realisation, Millie felt a hot blush creep up her neck. Thank God her cheeks didn't actually go pink. That would've been even more mortifying. Shoving aside the prickly feeling of seeing that glorious chest in such vivid detail, she focused on her annoyance and asked, "Can I help you?" as cool as the liquid nitrogen they used at the ice cream store in the town.

* * *

Sirius blinked once. Twice. "Er…" Was his first articulation. Great. Not only would Millie White think him incredibly rude, but also incredibly stupid. And that was _not_ the impression he wanted to make on her. She'd kept mostly to herself during the past two months of their acquaintance, but seemed like a friendly girl, a shy smile and a quiet word of hello always at the ready whenever their paths crossed.

As a happy bonus, she was _hot_.

Even dressed in faded flannel pyjamas, a tank, a sweatshirt, and that adorable scowl, she was a knockout. Something warm and a little prickly spread around the vicinity of his heart. God, he had it _bad_.

Her foot started tapping impatiently on the linoleum floor, bringing him back to his senses.

"I was wondering if I could ask you a favour," he said, finally remembering to lower his hand, ending his imitation of the Statue of Liberty.

"At three in the morning?" she asked, her scowl still in place.

"Um…" he ran a hand through his hair nervously. He'd never pegged her as particularly intimidating, but here she stood, a good half-foot shorter than he, her expression scary enough to fell even the mightiest of men – and Sirius was plenty mighty, he knew. "Yeah?"

She raised a single eyebrow, the eloquence in that act momentarily robbing him of speech. An awkward moment. Two.

Finally, his faculties returning to him on the ebbing wave of his debilitating crush, he said, "There's a spider in my room."

This, apparently, was enough to make her raise both her eyebrows. "A spider?" she clarified.

He nodded, his black hair falling into his eyes. He needed a haircut.

"And this is the reason that you were knocking down my door at three in the morning in nothing but a towel?"

"I wouldn't describe it as _knocking down the door,_ exactly –"

"And what do you want me to do about the spider?" she interrupted, clearly unimpressed with his attempts at conversation.

They were rather poor attempts, so he guessed that was understandable.

"Can you get rid of it? Please?" He tried to express his need for assistance without projecting his fear of the arachnid in question, but he suspected that it was a futile attempt since he wouldn't be standing in front of her asking for her help if he wasn't scared shitless.

Millie watched him for a long moment, her firewhiskey-coloured eyes lacking their usual dreaminess. Then, coming to some sort of decision, she shrugged, and said, "Let me just grab my wand."

"Thanks!" Sirius replied, feeling far more relieved at the prospect of not facing the monster in his room alone than was probably manly. But owning up to one's fears was also manly, right?

Right.

* * *

"Where is it?" Millie asked upon entering Sirius' room. She was surprised to see that the place was relatively neat and clean. No magazines with scantily dressed women were in sight, no dirty laundry acted as carpet on the floor, and whilst the calendar on the wall over the desk _did_ feature motorbikes, it also featured assignment due dates. Hell, even the bed was made up.

In short, Sirius Black's room was far cleaner than hers would ever be.

"Over there," he pointed to a space next to his desk, in front of his bed. Wand held lightly in her hand, she walked over, the bottom of her flannel pants whooshing softly against the furry rug that took up most of the floor space. It seemed like a comfortable place to lay down and study.

Not that she was thinking about studying in Sirius' room.

Just like she was not thinking about how _nice_ he smelt, fresh out of the shower, the scent of his deodorant lingering pleasantly in the air between them.

"I can't see it," she said, her voice coming out far sharper than she intended because of her annoyance at learning that her frat boy neighbour smelt _really nice_.

"It's gone?" Sirius asked, a note of alarm entering his voice.

She turned around to look at him. "Isn't that a good thing? You wanted the spider gone, and now it is."

She watched as he shoved his hand through his hair again in agitation, making it appear even more sexily dishevelled than usual. She couldn't help but take advantage of his momentary distraction to appreciate the almost-naked body that was on display. Her appreciation wasn't exactly sexual – no, he was far too perfect for that. The blue towel hung perilously low on his hips, revealing a sun-kissed upper body, every muscle outlined by skin stretched taught. The muscles of his arms were also defined clearly, almost as if for Millie's viewing pleasure alone.

No, Sirius Black, whilst ridiculously attractive, was not to be approached. His was a beauty to be admired from afar with inarticulate murmurs of half-comprehension, like a painting in an art gallery you had no business being in.

"This is horrible! Now it's crawling around somewhere in my room, waiting for me to lower my guard so that it can attack me!" he cried, jerking Millie out of her musings.

"You never mentioned it was an Acromantula," she replied evenly.

Sirius looked at her as if trying to work out whether she was being serious or not. She inwardly sighed. Aside from being ridiculously introverted, her sense of humour was often too dry by half for most people's tastes.

"They're the only species of spider I know that'll attack you without provocation," she further supplied, deciding that what the hell – she'd come this far.

Still watching her to discern her true meaning, he replied slowly, "It was big enough to be a baby Acromantula. It'll definitely attack me then."

It was Millie's turn to wonder if he was joking or not. She couldn't help the small smile that curved her lips though, at noticing the mischievous twinkle in his eye. And just that quickly, Sirius Black went from being an unapproachable work of art to a ridiculously attractive individual with a sense of humour almost as sly as hers. A match made in heaven, if she was given to romantic notions – or the concept of heaven.

"We'd better hunt it down then," she replied gravely, despite her amusement.

* * *

Sirius followed Millie around his room, as she looked in every place a spider could possibly hide. He trudged behind her in a sort of daze, mesmerised by the way her straight dark brown hair caught the light, how it moved in a sheet over her shoulder as she peered into the darkness under his desk.

"Thank you for doing this, by the way," Sirius said as way of beginning a conversation. He wasn't comfortable with silence.

"No problem," she replied absently. He knew this just to be politeness on her part. _Of course_ it was a problem. He'd dragger her away from the comfort of her room at three in the morning to hunt down a spider wearing nothing but a towel. He'd received the fright of his life at seeing the huge thing waving its legs in the air when he returned from the bathroom, and in a panic-induced haze, turned to the first person he could think of.

"I'm really sorry about disturbing your studying," he continued, rather enjoying the view of Millie White's backside as she looked under his bed by the dim light of her wand.

"How did you know I was studying?" she asked, standing up and turning around to look at him curiously.

"Er…" He stalled for time. How did you politely inform someone that you may or may not be paying more attention than acceptable to the habits of your cute neighbour? There were all sorts of things he knew about Millie White, like how she was a night owl, preferring to do her laundry after midnight, and that she only liked to study in the common room downstairs between the times of nine and one, and that her favourite teacup featured their school mascot, Boris the bumbling dragon sleeping belly-up. "I've noticed that you study late sometimes. And I figured that since your light was on…" he shrugged, trying to play it cool.

A slight furrow appeared between the arches of her eyebrows. "Oh," she said softly. "I see."

Sirius went to shove his hands in his pockets, realising too late that he was wearing only a thin towel. The force of his movements was just too much. The towel began to slip.

Millie's eyes widened, before she gave a little gasp and closed her eyes tight.

Sirius didn't know whether to feel embarrassed by the sudden decision of his towel to abscond his body, or to grin at Millie's reaction. Since she looked so adorable with her eyes scrunched so tightly and her shoulders a little hunched in mortification, he decided with the grin.

"Is this always your reaction to seeing someone naked?" he asked casually, picking up the offending piece of cloth from the ground and wrapping it firmly around his waist once again.

"I'm trying to give you some privacy, you moron!" she said through gritted teeth.

His grin widened. Interesting. Millie White was a little reserved when it came to nudity. Good to know for the future, he supposed. "I don't mind if you look," he teased.

Her face morphed into one of anger at his outrageous remark, her eyes remaining steadfastly closed. " _I_ mind if I look. Your sudden nakedness is unsolicited."

"That… is very true," he agreed. His delight in her reaction though could not be contained. Hell, he'd simply _have_ to find an excuse to talk to her again after they found and annihilated the blasted spider.

"Is it safe to open my eyes now?" she asked, apparently pacified by his quick agreement.

He couldn't help it – he laughed. "Yes, it's safe to look again, darling."

She opened her eyes with an _hmph_ and glared at him. "You could've put some pants on," she grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest.

Sirius tried not to notice the way the movement moulded her sweatshirt to her chest – too much. "But how would I shock your delicate sensibilities if I had pants on?"

Opening her mouth to give a scathing retort, he was sure, she instead froze. Her eyes widened, and her mouth gaped a little.

"Millie?" he asked, all teasing gone from his voice.

"Don't. Move," she said, no less forceful for her soft voice.

He froze instantly. "It's behind me, isn't it?" His voice had become just as soft as hers, his impending death giving him an air of solemnity that was rare to him. "Do you think it'll be a quick death?" he asked.

That seemed to snap her out of her shock at seeing the giant whopping creature of death and despair. "Sirius, it's on the back of your door, which is at least a good five feet away from where you're standing. I don't think it can reach you."

"Those things are fast, you know, especially when they scent prey." And Sirius had no doubt in his mind that the spider considered him prey. Why else would it have been lying in wait for him to return from his shower, unarmed and vulnerable?

She rolled her eyes at what seemed to him to be a very acceptable amount of concern, and moved towards the door. Her arm brushed against his as she went past him, the bare contact raising gooseflesh over his skin.

Yup, definitely going to see her again if he came out of this alive.

He turned around to watch her as she stopped within arm's reach of the spider, her wand arm pointing steadily at it. "It's not even that big," she muttered as a silvery thread slithered out from the tip of her wand. Upon reaching the vicinity of the spider, Millie twirled her wrist a little, making the thread elongate and flatten into a mesh ball, the spider encased safely within.

Taking a step back and turning around to face Sirius again, she waved her other hand in the general direction of his window. The spider hovered ominously between them, its silver prison glowing with an eerie light.

Sirius moved with great alacrity to open his window and get the hell out of the way as Millie followed him.

She stuck her hand out the window, and with a casual flick of her wrist, flicked the spider out into the ether, the silver ball disappearing half an instant later.

Drawing back in and sliding the window shut, she turned towards him and said deadpan, "Done. You are saved."

"Thanks," he replied, his gratitude and relief very genuine despite the dryness of her tone. He could've kissed Millie White just then. Although, to be fair, it didn't take much on her part to make him want to kiss her in the first place.

"If that's all… I'd better get back to my studying," her eyes flicked to the closed door, and she fidgeted a little, almost as if she was suddenly uncomfortable.

Sirius nodded. "Of course." He walked behind her to his door, standing maybe just a little too close than was polite as she swung it open and stepped outside.

He leaned against the doorframe as she took a few steps down the corridor towards her room, before pausing and turning around to look back at him.

She seemed almost surprised to see him standing there watching her. "Um… goodnight," she said, her voice returning to the almost-shy softness with which she greeted him in all of their encounters to date.

"Goodnight," he replied. "I'll see you around?" he couldn't help but add.

She nodded. "We _are_ neighbours, after all."

He nodded again.

Neither of them moved.

"Wanna hang out sometime?" he blurted. He cringed internally. _Wanna hang out sometime?_ Hells bells, was he fifteen? It was strange for him to be so nervous around women – usually, he had no trouble flirting and charming them. But his first real crush in Merlin knew how long, and he'd been reduced to a blubbering fool. Fantastic.

"Um…" she began, staring at him as if he was a little deranged. He definitely _felt_ a little deranged.

"Like a date," he clarified.

A heartbeat of total silence.

"You want to hang out… as a date?" she asked, her eyebrows scrunching in confusion. He decided that Millie White had the most expressive eyebrows.

He shook his head. "Forget about the hanging out part – just the date. Would you like to go out on a date? With me?" Sirius felt like banging his head against a wall. Who the fuck would she have thought he meant? Nearly Headless Nick?

Her face cleared all of a sudden, and when her lips quirked at the edges into the hint of a smile, his heart lifted in hope. But then, it fell all over again when she said, "You don't have to do that."

He frowned. "Do what?"

"Ask me out just because I got rid of a spider. It's okay. Your secret's safe with me."

"That's not –" he began hotly, but she interrupted him.

"Ask me again once the rush of surviving your brush with death's passed." The quirk to her lips was now a small smile, and there was mischief dancing in her eyes.

He paused for a moment, just to take her in, before nodding slowly. But he knew she expected him to not ask again.

"Goodnight, Sirius," she said again before turning to head to her room.

* * *

Millie couldn't help but glance up towards Sirius' room before heading into her own. She was a little surprised to see him still leaning in his doorway, watching her intently, the smile on his lips revealing a lean dimple in his left cheek.

Their eyes met.

Mischief and laughter sparkled in those clear grey irises. His smile deepened as he said, "Goodnight, darling."


	2. Cafe

Millie sat in a corner of her favourite coffee shop on campus. There was hardly any competition, since there were only two on the grounds themselves, and the other one had been undergoing renovations since her first day of freshman year over three years ago. No one ever saw any workers at the building, but vague construction sounds poured out into the quiet surrounds on a semi-regular basis.

She took a sip of her almost-tepid long black and peered out over the top of her textbook into the store, the early afternoon sun pouring through the window to her right. People watching was one of her favourite pastimes, something she could do anywhere at any time. No smartphone required.

It was unusually quiet at this time of the day. It was the first week of midterms, and this was a popular place to study, as the management didn't mind if you sat there with the same empty takeout cup for three hours straight. Although, since it was a Thursday, Millie assumed that people were either in class or eating lunch at the Great Hall with their friends. The Great Hall was really just a fancy word for their dining hall, but in typical Hogwarts fashion, everything had to sound grander than necessary. She supposed it was part of the baggage that came with being one of the oldest educational institutions still standing in the country.

"Want a refill, Millie?" Millie looked up at the sound of that familiar voice. Lily Evans' long deep red hair was pulled back today into a high ponytail. The bangs that she'd procured over the summer break were probably overdue for a trim, but somehow, she managed to pull it off, looking put-together and sophisticated.

Millie nodded, holding out her large takeout cup. "Aren't you supposed to be on break now?" she asked.

It was a measure of just how well they'd gotten to know each other over the past three and a bit years that Lily wasn't fazed anymore by such strange comments. Despite feeling vaguely inferior in appearance to her, what with her own hair in a messy bun, and wearing her standard uniform of sweatshirt and jeans, Lily Evans was possibly the closest thing to a friend Millie had here.

Lily smiled, "I was just about to take it." A slight pause, faint awkwardness colouring the air. "Do you mind if I sit with you for a bit?" she asked hesitantly.

Millie hid her surprise – and an unexpected bolt of delight – at the request by burying her face in her cup of coffee.

"Of course not," she murmured, speaking into the warm liquid. She felt a bubble pop against her lip. Slightly grossed out, she lowered the cup hastily, and was almost blinded by the dazzling smile Lily gave her.

* * *

Lily dropped herself in the seat across from Millie, and smiled encouragingly at the girl sitting across from her, her tall paper cup, sans lid, raised back to her mouth.

She and Millie had struck up what she liked to think of as a friendship of convenience over the last three years. They'd shared quite a few classes over the years, especially since Lily's major was Potions and Millie seemed to have a surprising love for the subject despite being an Arithmancy major herself. And, of course, there was always this coffee shop.

However, this was the first time Lily had taken the step of furthering their acquaintance. She got the distinct impression that Millie didn't really have any close friends, since she only ever saw her studying with someone else when it was for an assignment. She couldn't understand why. Whilst Millie was a little quiet, she didn't seem to have any apparent character flaws that would suggest that she would be a horrible friend.

"How are your midterms going?" Lily decided to open with a safe subject, tucking an errant strand of hair behind her ear. She needed to buy more bobby pins before her bangs got the best of her.

Millie shrugged in reply. "Can't complain. I'll be done by tomorrow afternoon. How about you?"

Lily sighed and leaned her forearms on the table, the scarred wood sun-warmed under her skin. "I have two left next week."

Millie smiled sympathetically, running the tip of her index finger over the coffee-stained rim of her cup. "I have no idea where you get the time to study. You're doing that internship with Slughorn, too, right?"

Lily nodded. "It's not so bad. Just a matter of planning my day a little more strictly than some of our fellow students are used to, I guess."

Millie nodded, her lips quirking in amusement, and opened her mouth to say something, but at that moment, the door swung open, bringing in the sound of raucous laughter.

Lily's lip curled in distaste without volition as she watched the four boys traipse into the café, completely obliterating the busy quiet with their hoots and guffaws. Two of them – Remus and Peter – headed to grab a table at the opposite side of the room from where she and Millie were situated, whilst the other two went up to the register to place their order. The taller of the two spoke to the barista, and from the blush that was spreading across the girl's cheeks, there was probably a lot more flirting than ordering going on.

The other boy, messy black hair sticking up out of his head at dangerous angles, glasses balanced somehow jauntily on the bridge of his long nose, glanced around.

Their eyes met for an electrifying instant, before Lily broke their unwanted connection and returned her attention to Millie.

Her eyes narrowed when she caught the small smile that Millie didn't quite manage to hide behind her cup. "What?" she asked, perhaps a little too sharply for a person with whom she'd only just begun her befriending campaign.

"Nothing," Millie replied quickly, but her smile grew wider. Lily was struck by how her face softened when she smiled like that, quiet mischief dancing in her light brown eyes.

"No, say it," Lily insisted.

Millie shrugged. "You're still not giving James a chance?"

Lily sniffed. The aforementioned boy with messy black hair and wicked hazel eyes, otherwise known as the bane of her existence, was the one to whom Millie referred.

"There's nothing between us to give a chance," she replied, straightening her back and injecting as much indifference as possible into her voice. "He's a git."

Millie nodded. "Agreed. But he's also sort of in love with you."

"He's also an arrogant, privileged ass who doesn't understand the meaning of the word 'no'."

Millie leant back in her chair, her eyes measuring Lily across the table with surprising steadiness and acuteness. Quiet and a little distant she may be, but Lily came to the realisation that Millie probably missed very little about what went on around her. "He hasn't asked you out this year, though. And it's obvious to anyone with a drop of empathy that he's still into you."

Lily opened her mouth to argue, but abruptly shut it again when she realised the truth in Millie's words. Not the part about Potter still liking her despite her continuous rebuffing of his suit, but the part about him not asking her out _even once_ this year. "How… do you know that?" It wasn't as if _all_ the times James had asked her out had been at her place of work.

"We're on the same Quidditch team," she shrugged. "We talk sometimes." Her lips quirked into a self-deprecating smile. "He's not a horrible person, you know. And he seems more… centred this year. Mature. Although he seems to be under the impression that we're friends – I suspect that's the reason he chats me up every now and again."

"I hope we are friends," Lily replied seriously. There was something about her tone that struck a chord in the vicinity of Lily's heart.

Another beat of silence as Millie watched her intently, before offering her a shy smile. "Of course," she replied softly.

Lily returned her smile, satisfied for the moment with that.

* * *

"Buddy, stop ogling Evans so obviously," Sirius said, lounging against the edge of a table as they waited for their order to be made. They were standing a little farther away than necessary, but he knew that this was the best vantage point from which Prongs could look at Lily discreetly – or as discreetly as James Potter was capable of being.

"I'm not _ogling_ her," James muttered, his eyes flicking off to the side every few seconds to take in the "luminous beauty of Lily Evans", as he'd once put it one drunk night. Whilst Sirius agreed that Evans was an attractive lady, he wouldn't go _that_ far.

 _Especially_ when he noticed that Evans was sharing a table with his incredibly hot neighbour.

He couldn't help the grin that spread across his face at the sight of her. His back straightened of its own accord, and his heart gave an unexpected leap as he remembered the efficient way in which she'd rescued him from certain death in the dead of the night last week. She hadn't noticed him staring at her, thank Merlin. Otherwise he was sure that he'd be consigned to the same category of 'creepy stalker dude' as Prongs.

The afternoon sun gilded her dark brown hair, and the slow grin with which she was gracing Evans almost knocked him off his feet. He wanted to make her smile like that at _him_ – he wanted to make her smile at him in every way possible.

Merlin's dirty underwear, he sounded like Prongs. Crushes could be horrible.

"Sirius?" the barista finally called out, their orders ready.

He felt Millie's eyes snap to him as he made his way over to the counter. Sirius steadfastly avoided her gaze; he didn't want her finding out that he'd been watching her.

"Thanks," he said, picking up the tray on the counter and giving the barista a dazzling smile. She rolled her eyes, but blushed.

As casually as he could, Sirius glanced over in the direction of Millie's corner table. Her smile was gone, a faint line in between her dark eyebrows as she looked at the space just to the right of him, where the barista had been moments before.

Her gaze drifted to the left, catching his before he could look away. The frown line deepened as their gazes met, tangled, enmeshed. It was as if time held its breath… before she blinked at him in what could only be termed as indifference, snapping the electrifying connection.

The whiplash came and whacked him right in the heart. _Not_ what he was hoping for, but at least she'd acknowledged his presence, if only for a moment. He'd got the distinct impression that she'd been avoiding him since the spider incident of last week.

He grinned, winking at her before turning to head towards their table. He was going to have fun playing with Millie White.

* * *

Lily raised her eyebrows at the retreating back of Sirius Black. Of the four Marauders, who thought they ruled supreme over the campus, Sirius Black was definitely the most notorious. He came from a rich old family, although it was an open secret that he'd been disowned not too long after starting at Hogwarts. That grin had broken the hearts of many girls in and around campus, and now it seemed that he had his sights set on her new friend.

Great. What were the two biggest dickheads in a hundred mile radius up to now?

"What was that all about?" she asked Millie, turning back to find her still frowning in the direction of a retreating Sirius.

"Hmm?" she asked, pulling her eyes away and directing them at her, the frown slowly melting off her face.

"You and Black. What was that about?"

Millie looked at her, bemused. "Nothing. Why?"

"Well, he winked at you." _And you were staring at him_ , she thought.

"He winks at everyone, I'm pretty sure," she replied, completely calm once again. "I think it might be a nervous tic."

Lily laughed at the deadpan way Millie had delivered that last line. "That seemed like a _special_ wink, though," she teased.

Millie rolled her eyes. "We're neighbours. If the wink seemed different from all his other ones, it's probably because it was his friendly neighbour wink."

Lily was almost certain that Sirius Black didn't want to be Millie's "friendly neighbour", but she kept her mouth shut. There was something definitely between those two, but their friendship was too new to push for details. "I should get back to work," Lily replied. "Let you get back to studying or whatever."

"Oh," a flash of fleeting disappointment, before it was hidden behind a polite smile. Again, something in Lily's heart hurt at the sight. "Well, it was lovely talking to you. Thanks."

Lily grinned. "I'll see you in class tomorrow?" she asked.

Millie nodded.

"Great. We can have lunch together afterwards at the Great Hall." If she had to steamroll Millie into being her friend, then so be it.

Millie's eyes widened, before she nodded again. This time, she was smiling.


	3. Cups

"Did you hear the news?" Lily came over to Millie's usual seat at the café, armed with a carafe of freshly brewed black coffee.

Millie pushed her empty paper cup forward, and Lily poured automatically. Since the day that Lily had pushed their acquaintance right into the stratosphere with the word "friends", Millie had been making the effort to leave the safe and comfortable confines of her dorm room and private little booth at the library to study at the café. Hell, she'd even started doing it when Lily _wasn't_ on duty.

A cute barista had even flirted with her. At least, that's what Lily told her later. Millie had been a little preoccupied with putting individual words into coherent sentences to really notice. Things were looking up.

"What news?" Millie asked, her cup now full. When Lily gestured at her books, she obediently levitated them out of the way so that Lily could spend a few extra seconds at her table under the pretence of wiping the surface clean.

"Sirius Black was dumped!" There was an unholy gleam in Lily's eyes at the words, which worried Millie on some level. Did her new friend secretly harbour a tendency towards violence? But these were the Marauders they were talking about – extreme acts were somewhat warranted, especially in Lily's opinion. The ginger had an almost zealous dislike for the foursome.

"I thought you didn't care about them?" Millie asked, hiding her smirk in her cup.

Lily narrowed her eyes into a glare. "You know I can see you smirking."

"Well, there goes that nefarious plan," Millie replied with a sigh, setting her cup down beside her Arithmancy assignment. She leant her elbow on the table, and her face on her hand. "Tell me more."

"Wait, how come you don't already know? Aren't you neighbours with him?"

"He doesn't whisper his secrets through the walls at me. And neither am I fond of listening in on his late-night amorous activities." In fact, Millie diligently renewed the soundproof charm on a weekly basis, especially on the wall she shared with one notorious Sirius Black.

"But don't you listen to the gossip when you do your laundry?"

"I usually do my laundry at one in the morning on a Thursday night. I enjoy the privacy, so that I can sort through my underwear without fear of judgement."

Lily blinked, pausing briefly in her fiftieth sweep of the table. "You're a strange one, aren't you, Millie?"

"It's good that you've realised this now," Millie said, completely unruffled. "Get out whilst you still can." She was only half-joking.

Lily frowned. "I'm not going anywhere." She punctuated that statement with a decisive nod and a brief narrowed glare in Millie's direction, before continuing, "So back to my story: Sirius Black got dumped!"

"I didn't even know he was seeing someone." Holy Merlin, he moved fast. Only three weeks ago, he'd been asking _her_ out on a date. But she'd said no, so _of course_ he'd asked someone else. It wasn't as if he needed to go into mourning over her rejection or anything. She'd _known_ that it was just the post-spider eradication high that had made him ask. Probably his weird, twisted way of saying thank you.

Lily rolled her eyes. "It's not like they were properly dating!"

Millie frowned, confused. "But you just said that he was dumped!"

The smartwatch on Lily's wrist beeped just then. "Oh, I'm on break now! I can sit down with you and finally talk!"

Her frown deepened. "Do you really want to spend the entirety of your break with me?"

"Yes. What's wrong with you? Do you have the flu? Should I drag you to the medical centre? The matron in charge of the place is super nice – actually everyone there is nice. I visited the counsellor last semester because of exam stress and he really helped me out –"

"I'm not sick," Millie interrupted, not sure what sort of can of worms Lily was about to open. Not that she didn't want to hear about Lily's life and support her and all, but her shift break didn't seem the perfect time for a deep and meaningful conversation like that. At the very least, there should be marshmallows involved. "But don't you need to… I don't know. Pee or something?"

Lily waved her hand dismissively. "I have excellent bladder control."

Millie didn't know what to say to that. Congratulations? Your ancient ancestors must have some excellent DNA? May your descendants share the same good fortune?

Luckily, she didn't have to, because Lily launched into her story. "So, I heard from a girl in my Alchemy class that Black and Marissa Painsley-Bumbershuffle hooked up last weekend at some party."

Millie nodded along, but by Lily's pause, she knew that the conversation required some sort of input from her. "Is she the senior from Ravenclaw Hall? Tall? Auburn hair? Pretty blue eyes? Always posts gym selfies of her looking really hot on Instagram?"

Lily nodded. "The one and only."

"How does she keep her makeup in one place while she works out? A sticking charm of some sort, do you think?"

"Probably. Also, she has a new pair of shoes every week – why?"

"Aesthetic, I'm guessing."

Lily considered this seriously for a moment, before nodding. "Probably. But back to my story. So the girl from my Alchemy class sometimes spots for Marissa when she's doing weights, and Marissa told her everything."

"Did they hook up, she think it was something more serious than it was, then he said something like 'this was just fun, baby!', then she got all into a huff and there was a lot of yelling and throwing of things. But _then_ , to calm her down, he says okay to a date, it goes disastrously, and then _she_ has the satisfaction of dumping him?"

Lily blinked. "… So you did hear this story after all?"

Millie nodded. "I did. Except it was the plot of last week's episode of _The Real Witches of Salem_."

"You watch _The Real Witches of Salem_?"

"For stress relief, yeah."

Lily lapsed into a thoughtful silence. Millie took the opportunity to sip her coffee, and think about the references she still needed for her Potions assignment. Merlin, how referencing was a bitch.

"Do you think that she made it up, then?" Lily asked, breaking Millie out of her mental rant on the completely and utterly illogical system that was _The Journal of Potions'_ reference style.

Millie shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. It must be nice to be able to say that you dumped one of the most sought-after males on campus."

"Yeah, maybe. I saw 'I heart Remus Lupin' t-shirts the other day."

"Honestly, I'd wear that."

"You're right. Remus is just so _nice_. If only the company he kept wasn't so…" Lily shuddered.

Millie laughed. "I'm sure they're wonderful people once you get to know them."

"Not if Marissa's story _is_ true."  
Millie shrugged again. "So what? Bad dates happen all the time. We're in college. We're young. We're stupid. We make out with people who probably have gingivitis!"

"That's contagious?"

Millie nodded. "Read about a cross-sectional study done over in a college in Virginia in _The Journal of Magical Maladies_."

"Since when is _gingivitis_ a magical malady?"

"Makes it all the worse, doesn't it? Something flossing and a standard mouthwash from the apothecary could keep at bay, and yet, so many potential hook-ups are haunted by the spectre of poor dental hygiene."

Lily gave her a strange look.

"What?" Millie asked, taking another sip of her coffee. "Gingivitis in my teeth?"

Lily's smile was bright and luminous. "You're such a weirdo. Don't ever change."

* * *

"Padfoot, stop moping," Prongs said, handing him a red cup. They were out on the lawn outside the front of Gryffindor Hall, enjoying the impromptu party that had sprung up to celebrate the official end to midterms. There was a part of Sirius that would miss college life at the end of the year, with its tendency to celebrate – and commiserate – every single moment of even slight note with dodgy alcohol and indie folk music. Another part of him couldn't wait to get away from college for the exact same reason.

"I am not moping," Sirius replied haughtily. He accepted the cup, sniffed cautiously at the suspicious concoction, then took a large gulp. His eyes scanned the crowd restlessly, hoping in vain to see a certain brunette. "I'm brooding. There's a difference."

"Brooding is just rich people talk for moping," Moony said, coming up from behind Sirius and James, holding his own red cup.

"Pretty sure it's just _Padfoot_ talk for moping," Wormtail supplied.

Prongs frowned at their most recently arrived friend. "How come you have a blue cup? I want a blue cup!"

Wormtail shrugged, making his neck disappear from view for a brief moment. "Just swung past Ravenclaw Hall. They have blue cups."

Prongs' mouth hung open in incredulousness. "Do all the Halls match their plastic cups to their colours?"

Sirius and Moony nodded. "Of course. Best way to show your Hall affiliation."

"I thought they only sold red cups at the store! How come I've never seen other coloured cups?"

None of the other three boys quite knew how to answer him. Whilst it was an unspoken understanding that James Potter was the leader of their little group, what with his brilliant mind, his fantastic grades, his prowess in amateur Quidditch, and his easy-going charm, he could be a little… quirky at times.

In typical James style, however, he didn't even register his friends' bemusement. "We must go investigate! All the Halls are having parties tonight, right? We can swing past each and steal a cup or three."

Moony frowned. "I have no interest in collecting plastic cups of different colours."

Wormtail shrugged again and nodded his agreement.

"Besides, _we_ all know that the different Halls have matching cups," Moony added.

Prongs huffed. "Fine. _I'll_ go investigate. You noobs stay here and enjoy the dubious liquor from boring, old red cups."

"Mine's blue," Wormtail muttered.

With that, Prongs swished around, sloshing half the contents of his boring, old red cup, and disappeared in the direction of the nearest Hall.

Sirius spent a few moments watching his best friend march away with purpose, before returning to his previous task of brooding – and searching for the ever-enigmatic Millie White. As Moony and Wormtail yabbered on about the minutiae of the next Defence assignment, Sirius' eyes systematically scanned the crowd. He was ninety-nine – well, okay, _eigty-five_ – percent sure that Millie would be here tonight. He hadn't seen her at a party before, like _ever_ , but he'd noticed that she'd been spending more time in the company of Lily Evans of late. And Evans, whilst not a huge party animal herself, always made an appearance at major social events like this at Gryffindor Hall. He was quietly confident that she'd drag along Millie as well.

Sirius' eyes caught a flash of red – the distinctive red of Evans' hair, to be more specific, since the lawn was basically a sea of red and gold, the colours of Gryffindor Hall. Evans made her way across to the drinks tables, and sure enough, there was Millie White, trailing along behind her.

In a dress.

And just like that, Sirius' night became a lot more interesting.

* * *

Millie wasn't quite sure what she was doing here. "I'm not quite sure what I'm doing here," she muttered to Lily.

Lily flashed a grin at the guy who scooped up a suspicious liquid from what appeared to be a small porcelain bathtub into two red plastic cups. He handed them to her with a somewhat manic grin of his own. Millie took a further small step behind Lily, trying to hide from the possibility of social interaction.

"You live here," Lily replied, handing her one of the red cups.

Millie raised one of her eyebrows in surprise as Lily took a fearless sip of what Millie could only presume was bathwater, considering it came from an actual _bathtub_. Gryffies, as residents of Gryffindor Hall were affectionately named, had a reputation for being brave and a little foolhardy, and Millie had never seen more proof of that than in this moment.

"I do not live on the lawn outside Gryffindor Hall. I live _inside_ it. I have a bed and everything," Millie replied. She looked down dubiously at the contents of her cup, and decided it was best to simply hold it. It was _purple_ , for fuck's sake.

Lily rolled her eyes in reply. She linked her arm through Millie's and dragged her over towards an empty patch of grass. They stood side by side, and surveyed the party. It seemed as if they'd arrived at its very height. Millie was pretty sure all the Gryffies were out here on the lawn celebrating the end of midterms. She stood stiffly, her red cup clutched in her hand tightly, and wondered how long she'd have to stay before she could return back to the comfort of her dorm room. There was a nature documentary about the Pacific Ocean, hosted by her favourite naturalist Newt Scamander, airing in about twenty minutes.

"This is fun!" Lily said out of the blue. "Are you having fun? I'm having fun!"

Millie shot Lily an incredulous look.

"Don't scrunch your nose at me like that!" Lily cried in reply. "Parties _are_ fun. _This_ party is fun."

"I'm not sure who you're trying to convince right now."

Lily narrowed her eyes at her, and poked her in the arm. "If you'd just –"

"I'm not talking to anyone," Millie interrupted. "I'm already wearing this infernal dress. Don't ask more of me, please."

Lily huffed. "Fine. But you look lovely in the dress."

Secretly, Millie agreed, but she didn't want to give Lily the satisfaction of being right about it. They'd argued for a good half an hour before Lily had managed to wear her down into agreeing to borrow something from Lily's closet. It was a pretty, black thing with bright little flowers printed all over, floating to just above her knees. She'd been relieved when Lily hadn't put up a fuss with Millie's choice of her black Converse high-tops.

A few moments of silence passed before Millie felt the need to break it. "Lily, you can go, if you like."

"I'm not leaving you," Lily said. "The moment I do, you'll scurry back to your room."

"I'm touched," Millie replied sarcastically, even though Lily was mostly right. "But you shouldn't be stuck with me all night. Don't let my social ineptitude ruin your night."

"You're not ruining my night!"

Millie sighed. If there was just one word that she could use to describe Lily Evans, it would be loyal. Almost to a fault. "I _am_ ruining your night. I know you have other friends. Go hang out with them."

Lily chewed her lip, the competing desires warring within her clearly visible on her face. "You could come with me, you know."

God, what must it be like to be so _nice_ all the time? Millie felt exhausted at the very idea. "I could," she conceded.

Lily sighed. "But you won't."

Millie didn't reply. She'd met Lily's friends a few times, now, and they were perfectly lovely people. But it was just so _hard_ connecting with people most of the time.

"They don't hate you, you know. Shaurya was asking about you the other day."

"Are you trying to set me up with Shaurya Kapoor?" Millie asked.

Lily shrugged and grinned, unrepentant. "It's worth a shot, right?"

Millie laughed. "Go away, Lily. I mean it."

"Ugh. Fine. But promise you'll come find me later, okay?"

Millie looked at her friend, her emerald green eyes earnest, and her beautiful face showing a touch of concern. "Fine. I'll come find you later."

"Yay!" Lily flung her arms around her in a surprise hug, before practically bouncing away.

* * *

Sirius watched as Lily left Millie's side after disengaging from an exuberant hug. The brunette visibly relaxed as she watched her friend enter the fray. Sirius frowned thoughtfully at this interesting reaction as he made his way over to her.

He walked up to her unnoticed, her face still turned away from him. "I didn't think you'd come," he said, as way of an opening.

Millie turned towards him, surprised.

His breath caught in his throat, struck by just how _lovely_ she was. Except for the dress, she looked just the way she usually did. Her hair was down around her shoulders, she had no makeup on, and tiny diamond studs twinkled on her earlobes as always. She was even wearing a pair of well-loved, black All-Stars. But maybe because it had been three whole weeks since he'd talked to her last, since he'd been _this close_ to her last, she looked somehow different.

"Oh, it's you!" she replied.

Or maybe it was because he had a colossal crush on a girl who barely even noticed his existence. "Yes. It's me." He gave her a lazy grin, even though his insides were all akimbo. He was pretty sure his intestines were wrapping around his lungs at that moment.

There were a few beats of silence before Millie said, "Why didn't you think I'd come to the party?" Merlin's saggy boxers, even her _frown_ was adorable.

He shrugged. "I don't think I've ever seen you at one before."

Her frown deepened. "Do you always look?"

"Well… no, but –" Sirius stopped, unsure of where this sentence was going. _"I know you keep to yourself."_ That sounded kind of rude – and a little creepy. He _knew_? Like a creepy stalker person? Like _Prongs_? Nope. Never like Prongs.

"… I'm glad you're here." There. That seemed like a safe option.

Apparently, it wasn't, because to his alarm, her frown deepened. "I… okay," she replied. She blinked at him once, before flicking her gaze towards the people around them. They were near the fringes of the crowd, in the outer glow of one of the floating balls of light that served as street lamps on campus.

"How have you been?" he asked, searching for a way to engage her into conversation. He couldn't recall the last time he'd had so much trouble talking to someone, especially a girl.

"Fine," she replied, moving the cup she was holding in her hand to her lips absentmindedly. Sirius watched in fascination as her lips parted, just a little, but before any of the lurid purple brew could pour into her mouth, she jerked the cup back down. She stared down at her own hand, as if surprised that it had moved without her conscious permission.

"Teetotaler tonight?" Sirius asked, grinning.

Millie pursed those wonderful, soft lips at him. "I'm a teetotaler every time I'm given alcohol from a bathtub."

Sirius nodded. "Touché." He took a sip from his own half-empty cup before saying, "Although, for alcoholic bathwater, it isn't all that bad."

She scrunched her nose. "I'll take your word for it."

Sirius grinned again. Why was he grinning so much? He _never_ grinned this much. No, Sirius Black brooded, and when he wasn't brooding, he _smirked_. Smirks were sexy. Grins were… well, they were just grins.

"I'm sorry about what happened with Marissa," Millie said quietly.

Sirius' grin disappeared. Damnit. She'd heard about that. "Oh. You heard about that."

Millie raised an eyebrow. "I think the entire campus heard about that."

Sirius shrugged. He didn't want to talk about Marissa Painsley-Bumbershuffle. It had been a mistake hooking up with her, he knew, but he'd been a little tipsy at the time. And, okay, he'd been a little frustrated at Millie's rebuff of him the night she'd rescued him from the baby Acromantula. And that he hadn't really seen her since then. He was ninety-nine percent sure that she'd been avoiding him, even in the corridor. "It's no big deal."

Millie's lips curved, and she raised an eyebrow. "Are you so used to your former flames screeching about your no-good, commitment-phobic, self-absorbed person?"

"No-good, commitment-phobic, self-absorbed person?" Sirius asked mildly, raising his eyebrows. "Is _that_ what she'd been yelling about? I hadn't noticed."

Her eyebrow rose further. Sirius had the urge to write bad poetry about Millie White's eyebrows. "It doesn't bother you even a little bit?"

It did bother him, actually. Especially because he knew that no girl in her right mind would ever take him seriously with the kind of reputation he had. But was it so wrong to have a little fun? He was in _college_ , for the love of Merlin.

But then he looked at Millie standing there, and all he wanted was for her to take a chance on him. Maybe for the right woman…

Something close to his heart itched in agreement. Godric's saggy balls, this crush would be the end of him. But because he was an impulsive idiot, he couldn't stop his mouth from asking, "Will you go out with me?"

Millie's mouth dropped open. "No!"

Sirius' stomach dropped to his ankles. "God, no need to be gentle about my feelings," he muttered. He gulped the vile purple drink from the blasted red cup.

Millie shook her head. "I didn't mean… well, no. I _did_ mean no. I was just… surprised."

"Why?" Sirius asked, genuinely curious. "I asked you out before as well."

"Yes – but that was different. You'd had a recent brush with death."

Sirius' eyes narrowed. "Are you making fun of me?"

Millie's lips curved again. "A little bit. But the reason is still valid."

"Okay, but my life is not in imminent danger right now. I am of sane mind and body."

The look that Millie gave him said that she very much doubted that. "I think you just asked me out because you _are_ hurt about Marissa."

Sirius squeezed the now empty red cup until he felt the two sides meet in the middle. "I don't give two flying figs about Marissa," he said through gritted teeth.

Millie tilted her head, regarding him thoughtfully. Her amber eyes were eerily intense as she stared at him. Sirius bit down on the urge to fidget under it. "But you _are_ bothered by what people think about you."

Her words hit a little too close to home. "You make me sound so self-absorbed."

Millie shrugged. "You probably are. But I think everyone is a little self-absorbed."

Sirius frowned. "Was that a compliment? I couldn't tell."

She snorted. "No."

He grinned. Again, with the grinning. "So _would_ you go out with me? If you thought I was asking you because I want to? Hypothetically speaking?"

She thought about it for a moment, before replying, "Probably not."

"Why not?" he asked hotly.

"Aside from the fact that I don't particularly like the idea of being a rebound? I don't think I'm your type."

"You have no idea what my type is. Also, I don't need a rebound."

Her eyebrows spoke volumes about what she thought his type was, and his need for a rebound, but she didn't pick up the gauntlet. "You're not really my type, then."

"Now you're just being contrary."

Millie smiled at him. Actually, honest to Merlin, _smiled_ at him. His stomach zoomed up from his ankles to somewhere around the top of his lungs. That _had_ to be the reason he couldn't quite breathe all of a sudden. God, she was just so stunning when she smiled. "A little bit," she conceded.

Sirius just stood there, speechless. What could he _ever_ say that would in any way measure up to a smile like that?

"Anyway, I have to go find Lily now," Millie continued, oblivious to the guitar that had started strumming away in his head. It was some terribly romantic Spanish solo that he'd never admit to knowing, let alone hearing when a girl smiled at him. "I promised her I'd see her later tonight."

She looked at him, clearly expecting him to take his turn in the conversation. "Yeah. Okay. Cool." What. The fuck. Was wrong with him? "I have to go find Prongs."

"What? Did he get lost?" she asked.

"He went looking for different coloured cups."

She just blinked at him. "That's… okay. You go find him."

"Okay."

With one last confused look, she turned away from him and headed into the crowd.

Sirius stood there, watching her go _again_ , and thought to himself: well, _fuck_.


	4. Bacon

"I've made a horrible mistake," Lily announced. She flopped into a seat next to Millie at the table she was currently occupying. It was still relatively early on a Saturday morning, but uncharacteristically for her, Millie had woken up early and was actually hungry enough for breakfast.

"Oh?" Millie murmured, moving her plate of pancakes, bacon, eggs, and crunchy potato gems – all smothered in golden syrup, of course – out of the way of Lily's errant elbow.

"Yes." Millie regarded her friend's face more closely. She had dark circles under her eyes, and her normally pale skin was even paler. She'd flung her lovely, dark red hair over one shoulder. Wearing a Gryffindor Hall hoodie, old jeans, and tennis shoes, Lily _still_ looked far more sophisticated and put-together than Millie ever would. Was it genetic? Was it something that she'd learnt at an early age? Ballet? Yoga?

"You do look a little pale," Millie replied quietly, watching Lily over the edge of her second cup of black coffee.

Lily wrinkled her nose. "Do you ever drink anything other than coffee?" she asked. "I don't think I've ever seen you drink even water."

Millie shrugged. "I drink a lot of green tea, too. But that's usually in my room where I have a kettle – but that's not what we were talking about. You made a horrible mistake."

"Oh, yes. My horrible mistake."

Millie looked at her expectantly.

Lily looked back at her for a moment, before taking a deep breath. "I made out with Potter."

Millie breathed in sharply, forgetting that she was sipping at the exact same time, so her lukewarm coffee went down the wrong pipe. She spluttered and coughed, trying to remove the liquid before it reached her lungs and she drowned in coffee from the inside out. What a way to go.

Lily slapped her back somewhat ineffectively as Millie attempted to hack out a tonsil or two with the errant coffee.

"What?" she asked, with the first breath she was able to pull into her – thankfully dry – lungs.

Lily's look was bleak. "I know!" she moaned, flopping her head down to the table. Millie winced at the sound her forehead made as it slapped onto its surface. Her red hair fanned out around her face, obscuring it from view. "This is the _worst_ ," she continued to moan through the thick curtain of hair.

Millie, unsure of what was required of her in this situation, awkwardly patted Lily's back. One, two, three times. There. Any more, and things would just become _too_ awkward. "Tell me what happened," Millie said. Clearly, this wasn't a situation that required any sort of tangible solution. Her friend just needed someone to vent to.

God, since when had she managed to procure an actual _friend_ who told her about their _actual_ problems? Despite all logical indications that this was an added social stress in her life that she just didn't need, a strange warmth spread through her chest. Lily _needed_ her. She squared her shoulders, straightened her back, and put down her coffee cup.

"Okay, so after you left the party," Lily continued to talk through her hair. Millie leant in a little closer to hear her better. "Which I'm a little pissed at you for doing, by the way. I'm sure if you'd been there, none of this would've happened."

"What _did_ happen, Lily?" Millie asked, ignoring her friend's jibe. She'd done as promised – finding Lily after leaving her bewildering conversation with _Sirius Black_ of all people, spending approximately twenty-eight minutes hanging out with Lily's friends – which mostly involved her staying quiet and listening to the ebb and flow of conversation around her, clutching her untouched bathtub alcoholic beverage tight in her hand – and then quietly vanished to the peace and quiet of her dorm room. She'd spent a few minutes standing at her window, watching the revelry. A sense of accomplishment had spread through her as she'd stood there. She, Millie White, had spent an entire _ninety minutes_ at a college party. Something to cross off the bucket list, for sure.

"So, you left. And then I think I might have imbibed a little too freely from the bathtub. But that _really_ wasn't my fault. The guy in charge was just _so_ friendly – you saw him."

Millie didn't think a manic grin made anyone appear particularly friendly, especially if they were giving out strange purple liquid from a _bathtub_ , but she kept her thoughts to herself, and just nodded for Lily to continue.

"So, yeah. I may have become a _leettle_ bit tipsy, and then _Potter_ was there, and he was wearing a necklace of different coloured plastic cups – which was weird, even for him – and then we were _dancing_ , and _then_ we were making out, and it was so –"

Millie raised an eyebrow. "I _really_ don't want the details, but I think in this case, some paraphrasing may be necessary." Millie had a sneaking suspicion what Lily would say, but it was important for her to say it out loud. And maybe acknowledge that her feelings were valid. That she even _had_ feelings that weren't just a deep-set hatred for the boy with jaunty black hair, and even jauntier glasses.

Lily was quiet for a long time. She sat up straight again, and stared off into the distance. Millie pushed her plate of food in her direction, gesturing that Lily should help herself. Lily absently picked up a piece of bacon and chewed.

Millie quickly finished off her cup of coffee, and _accio_ -ed the carafe from across the room. Pouring her third cup of the morning, she waited patiently for Lily to continue.

Finally, Lily said quietly, "It was… nice."

Millie didn't say anything, waiting a little bit more.

"That's the worst part," Lily blurted. It seemed that now she'd started, she couldn't stop. "I've spent _so long_ hating him, and now my treacherous body enjoyed making out with James Potter. What am I going to do?" Lily wailed, before taking another piece of bacon.

Millie shrugged. "I'm hardly qualified to speak on this matter, what with no such similar experiences myself, but from what I have gathered through my observations of our fellow peers, I don't think there's anything you _need_ to do."

Lily blinked at her as if she'd spewed forth wisdom like a mountain-top sage. Millie wasn't quite sure how she felt about that. "You… really think so?"

Millie nodded, taking a large gulp of coffee to fortify herself. Merlin, she didn't think her opinion on something that wasn't academic had mattered to someone for… well, ages. Not since her parents had died, probably.

Pushing _that_ particular thought away quick-smart, Millie continued. "You can ignore its very existence, if you like. Pretend it never happened."

"Why do I get the sense that there's a 'but' coming?"

"Probably because you're thinking about James Potter's butt."

Lily gasped in outrage, but Millie's desired effect was achieved, a shocked sort of amusement now dancing in her eyes.

" _But_ … I don't think you should ignore this."

Lily sat there in silence, and Millie stabbed her fork at a potato. Its fried, golden goodness burst into her mouth, saturated with the saccharine syrup. If heaven existed, it would probably taste like this potato. "Should I talk to him, maybe?"

"That's a good place to start as any," Millie replied, shoving another potato in her mouth, this time accompanied with a sliver of bacon. She'd been wrong – _this_ was what heaven tasted like. "Maybe you can work something out. I mean, you don't have to date him to kiss him."

Lily regarded her thoughtfully. "That is a very good point, and requires further consideration."

Millie bobbed her head, and grinned. "Great. In return for my wisdom, can you get me some more bacon?"


	5. Crush

It was whilst sitting in her art elective class, near the back as usual, that Millie mused why, of all her twenty-one years on planet Earth, _this_ was the one destined to be filled with boy drama. Of course, not believing in destiny, she chalked it down to a case of bad luck. Being an Arithmancy major, she definitely believed in bad luck – the universe's way of laughing at puny humans. _Haha! You thought the future was written in the stars? Wrong! It's etched in randomness! And randomness is my bitch!_

Her teacher for this class was a doddering old man, who always wore tweed, even during the height of summer, and enjoyed twirling his snow white moustache. He looked to be someone far more comfortable in the Potions department than the creative arts one, but there you had it. Breaking stereotypes at its best.

It was unfortunate that he was so adamant on art theory, though. It was during one of these such lectures that Millie first saw him.

It was his hair that had first caught her attention. She'd been aimlessly doodling in the margin of her notes, and, looking up randomly, just to pretend to be at least a little engaged in the class, her gaze had been distracted by an unexpected glint. The sun was pouring through the tall glass windows, the brightness almost obscene this late in the year. Millie squinted a little through the glare to determine what was so shiny.

It was the most beautiful golden hair she'd ever seen. Thick and artfully styled into what could only be described as ocean waves, it was a fascinating mix of wheat, amber, and gold. Like, _actual_ gold. It was mesmerising.

The person to which such a magnificent head of hair belonged turned around in their seat just then. And locked gazes directly with hers.

She was falling. Falling and drowning in a blue that could have belonged to the Caribbean Sea, or the Australian desert sky.

And _then_ , he smiled. At her.

And just like that, she felt herself fall a little in love.

At this sudden, and quite frankly, unwanted development, Millie abruptly broke eye contact and stared back down at her notes. She barely even noticed the paper was there.

This could _not_ be happening to her. Millie White didn't _get_ crushes – especially ones that were so sudden and, and – _intense_. She glanced up through her lashes to catch a glimpse of the Adonis. He'd turned back to the front of the room, so feeling that it was now safe, she stared to her heart's content at the back of his head. Merlin, did hair like that even exist outside of fairy tales and shampoo commercials? She hadn't thought so, but here was the evidence right before her eyes.

And those _eyes_. Goodness, she could happily imagine herself getting lost in those deep, soulful eyes for hours on end.

It was about this time that her usual, practical self reared its ugly head. The part of her that had quickly fallen head over heels over some random guy's aesthetic wanted to viciously bash practical Millie. She was always ruining the fun.

But Millie couldn't help but give a mental moan about just how messy her non-existent love life had become in the span of a few short weeks. She'd had not one, but two entire conversations with Hogwarts' most adored playboy, and was now suddenly crushing on a guy who resembled a Greek hero.

On the plus side, she now had something exciting to tell Lily about for a change.

* * *

"Can you come hide behind the counter for a second?" Lily muttered. She'd come over to Millie's usual study table under her normal guise of wiping it. It must be the cleanest surface in the entire shop.

Millie looked up at her friend, and squinted at her in confusion. "Excuse me?"

Lily fidgeted, and looked around furtively. "It's just that – well. _You know who_ is here."

Millie was sceptical. "Do I _really_ know who?"

"Yes." Millie was amazed at just how clear Lily's growing agitation was through her gritted teeth. "You do." She gave a subtle head nod towards the other side of the café. Millie obediently peeked over as clandestinely as she could. It was difficult to mistake that shock of black hair – as well as the other, carefully dishevelled set of dark locks.

"Ah," Millie said, returning to an upright position, and taking a sip of her fresh cup of coffee. "I see."

Lily rolled her eyes. "So please. Can you come behind the counter?"

"I don't understand –"

"Just – for me, okay? I don't want to deal with Potter, and – and –"

"The insanely hot hook up you shared last Friday evening?"

This time, Lily pursed her lips into a thin flat line. "Yes. Exactly."

Millie blinked, but decided not to argue the point. "Alright, fine."

"Okay!" Lily gave an especially vigorous swipe of the cloth across the table. "I'll go to the counter first, and then about thirty seconds later, you pretend to go to the bathroom, and duck down behind the coffee machine, okay?"

Millie nodded, her face serious. "Okay," she agreed solemnly. "Afterwards, we'll infiltrate the Ministry and steal some state secrets."

The glare Lily gave her was especially withering.

Millie just grinned in reply.

* * *

"Where did she go?" Prongs muttered. He craned his neck to see around the decidedly small café.

Sirius watched his friend make a fool of himself for a few moments before saying, "She probably went to the bathroom or something. Or the staff room. Or to Mars, to get away from your stalker-ish tendencies."

James paused in his search for an errant Lily Evans for a brief second to throw an exasperated glare at his best friend. "Your girlfriend has disappeared, too."

"I don't have a girlfriend," was Sirius' automatic reply.

"Okay, fine. The woman who you _want_ , with the deepest longing your cold, shrivelled, cynical heart can muster, to be your girlfriend, has also disappeared."

Sirius couldn't quite think of an adequate reply in the appropriate time frame, so he simply muttered, "My heart's not cynical," and slunk a little into his chair. There was something about bad posture that really leant itself to brooding.

Unlike Prongs, he had a full view of the café, and indeed, he was surprised to note that for the brief few moments his surreptitious gaze had wandered away from the vicinity of Millie's table, she had disappeared. Considering the amount of caffeine that girl consumed on a daily basis, she probably _had_ ducked out to the bathroom.

Apparently tired of searching for a fleeting glimpse of his lady love, Prongs returned his attention to Sirius. The intense stare he gave him had Sirius feeling a little on edge, but he held it.

When James didn't say anything for more than thirty seconds, Sirius felt compelled to ask, "Are we having a staring contest, or…?"

"Are you in love with Millie White?" James asked. Or rather, demanded.

"What? No! Of course not!" Sirius cringed at just how much that had sounded like a yelp. And in this instance, a yelp was the equivalent to a full confession.

James just stared at him some more. "It's okay if you are. You're allowed to like people, Padfoot."

Sirius shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Aside from the other three Marauders, liking people – in the way he knew Prongs meant it, with all his heart and soul – hadn't quite worked out for him in the past. And that was partly the reason why this dumb crush had him so worried. It had been almost an entire month since he'd had his first real conversation with Millie – had, in fact, been stark naked in front of her, if only for a brief moment – and his crush didn't seem to be inclined to just _go away_ anytime soon. Even after _two whole rejections_ , his stupid, idiotic brain had gone ahead and intensified its feelings towards the pretty brunette. He'd almost decided to spend the entire weekend out in the corridor, between their two rooms, just for a glimpse of her. It was borderline ridiculous.

Perhaps he could fake another spider invasion. Maybe it undermined his masculinity, but he was man enough to admit that he just could not handle some situations – spiders being chief among them.

"So what are you going to do about it?" James asked.

"Do about what?" Sirius shrugged. He knew full well what his friend meant, but it wasn't something he exactly wanted to discuss. Getting rejected was bad enough. Getting rejected twice – on top of the whole fiasco with Marissa – was just too much.

"Your deep and undying love for Millie."

"Prongs, are you high right now?"

James had the audacity to give him a loopy grin. "You can't give up."

"Why not? She's not interested. It's a waste of time."

James shook his head. "Do you seriously believe that? This is the first girl you've actually liked as an actual person in goodness knows how long, and you're going to be defeated by something as measly as two pathetic rejections?"

"Yes. Because otherwise I end up like you, pining away after the same chick for over three years."

James just brushed this off. "I'm sure Lily will come around."  
"How? She hates you."

"She doesn't hate me."

There was something about James' smug expression that made Sirius' eyes narrow. Something had changed between Evans and Prongs, apparently. It was the only explanation for why he was even more upbeat and hopeful about their potential relationship. "What –" Sirius began.

He was rudely cut off by James, "Did she ever directly reject _you_ , or did she always say no because of the circumstances?"

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "It was the circumstances, but really, let's not grasp at straws here –"

"No, no! This is great!" James rubbed his hands together. It was a little sad that after diligently cheering on his own horrible love life, Prongs' next favourite hobby was cheering on his friends' horrible love lives. There had been one time when Wormtail had been casually dating a guy in his Charms class for all of three months, and James had started to plan their wedding. Sometimes, his resemblance to an overeager puppy was uncanny. "It means that she doesn't hate you!"

"I can see how that is a beacon of hope in your view, given how much Evans despises you –"

"I _told_ you. She doesn't despise me."

"– _But_ , in my case 'not hating me' does not equal 'wants to date me'."

"Then _make_ her want to date you! Use your charms!"

Sirius sat back in his chair, incensed. "I am _not_ Confunding her!"

James rolled his eyes. "God, you're such a drama queen. _Use your charms_. Woo her! _Court_ her! Dazzle her with your brilliance and kind nature! Show her that you're a real person – with real feelings – especially for her!"

Sirius was loathe to admit it, but somewhere amongst all of James' enthusiasm, he'd started to make a little sense. Maybe, all he needed to do was show her that deep down, beyond all the gossip, and the bullshit, and the messed up family crap, he was just a guy. And he liked her.

"Okay…" Sirius agreed reluctantly. "But how?"

James' face fell. "If I knew _that_ , I'd probably be proposing to Evans right about now."

* * *

"I take it we're crouched behind the counter right now because you haven't talked to James yet," Millie began. She was on her haunches, Lily right beside her. The barista was being very polite, ignoring their antics.

"No, I haven't talked to James yet," Lily said quietly. She closed her eyes for a brief few moments. "I just… haven't figured out how."

"Usually, you just open your mouth, and move your lips, and through local motor neuron control, your brain can turn air rushing past your vocal cords to sound, and –"

The barista snorted. Lily turned to give him a glare. Millie gave him a thankful smile. Someone appreciated her humour at least.

"I just – I just need a little time, okay? This is a big change for me! I'm still trying to come to grips with going from hating someone to enjoying –" Remembering where they were, Lily abruptly closed her mouth. The barista gave them a curious glance, but at that moment, a customer came up to place an order.

"Anyway, enough about me! What about you? You texted me before to say that you had something to tell me?"

"Yes." Millie's voice was quiet, barely audible over the angry sounds of the coffee machine – which was just how she wanted it. It was already hard enough to tell Lily about this. But she knew that if she wanted this to work, she'd need help. This situation was _way_ out of her league.

Also, it felt nice to have someone with whom she could actually talk about such things. It was a pleasant change from her usual solitary existence.

"I – I met someone. A boy," Millie mumbled.

Lily gasped and tumbled. She stopped herself from face-planting into the gross floor by managing to put her arms out in time. Millie placed her hands on her shoulders to help her stabilise. "No way!" Lily screeched. "Tell me everything! How did you guys meet? What did he say? What did _you_ say? What does he look like? Which Hall is he at? _What's his name?_ "

"Um…" Millie's stomach sank in the face of such enthusiasm. "Maybe _met_ is too strong a word."

Lily's brows furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"We just… we just looked at each other."

"Like… a staring contest, or something?"

Millie sighed. She mumbled and stumbled her way through the story. Lily listened intently, and upon Millie petering to a halt with a lame "Um, yeah. That's it," she hummed thoughtfully.

"I think I know who that is," Lily mused.

"Really?" Millie asked, surprised. She was half-convinced that he'd been a figment of her imagination. Surely, she would've noticed someone as perfect as him before.

"Yeah. He transferred here from Britain, I think. He's at Ravenclaw Hall."

"Will you tell me his name, or keep me in suspense for the rest of my life?" Millie asked testily.

Lily shot her an amused look. "My, don't crushes make _you_ grumpy."

"Lily…"

"Okay, fine. His name is Rafe Scamander."

" _Rafe_ Scamander? Rafe _Scamander_? _Rafe Scamander?"_

"I don't think saying his name with increases in pitch is going to change it," Lily said. Her amusement was going to get on Millie's nerves, but she was too shocked to care right now. Rafe Scamander was the son of the super famous, super talented, super British naturalist Newt Scamander. Hell, he was _so_ famous that not only did they use his textbook in Magizoology class, he actually appeared on television.

"I thought his son had defied the family name!" Millie cried.

"I guess attending a school across the Atlantic, and taking an _art class_ to boot _does_ defy the family name," Lily said evenly.

"Excuse me, _I_ take that art class. There's nothing even remotely rebellious about it!"

"That's just because your father isn't the most recognisable face in magical science communication."

Lily did have a point. The revelation of her brand new crush's identity finally made Millie's legs give out beneath her. She landed on her butt with a dull thud, for once uncaring about all the germs that were sure to be replicating without inhibition all over it.

Of all the people she could have gone and had a crush on, Rafe Scamander came second to probably only Sirius Black. If parallel universes existed, and if in one such parallel universe Millie was actually not a socially awkward turtle, and she worked up the courage to express her romantic interest in him, he'd just think she was into him because of his fame.

"This cannot be happening to me," Millie moaned. She leant back against the cabinets on the far wall, bumping her head. The barista shot her a sympathetic look over his shoulder.

"If it's any consolation," he said, "I completely agree with you. That Rafe Scamander is _definitely_ swoon-worthy."

Lily gave him a look. "Aren't you engaged, Frank?"

"A man can look," he muttered, returning to cleaning the milk nozzle with perhaps a little more gusto than was warranted.

Lily turned back Millie, and scooted closer to her. "I am failing to see a problem here, although I _can_ tell that you think there is one."

"I'm just… not very good with people," Millie muttered. "And so far, that's been _fine_. But now…"

Lily gave her a warm smile, and somehow, Millie's situation didn't seem so dire. There was something truly magical about a Lily Evans smile. "It's okay to like people, Millie."

"That's not the problem," Millie muttered. "The problem is to get them to like me _back_."

"I like you!" Frank threw over his shoulder.

"Thanks, Frank," Millie said.

"Not helping, Frank," Lily replied at the same time. She wrapped her arms around Millie's shoulders.

As usual, Millie was a little surprised at the physical contact. This hugging business was taking a little getting used to. "We'll work it out, okay?" Lily murmured.

Millie sighed and relaxed into the hug, going even so far as to return it. "I hope so."

Or maybe she could just move to Mars.


	6. Feelings

"For the love of Merlin!" Sirius stormed into Moony's room, not bothering to knock, and shoved his hands through his hair in frustration. "When will the madness end?"

Moony, in typical Moony fashion, didn't look up from the textbook he was perusing. Whilst Sirius was used to such behaviour, he wondered why he'd come to Moony for a good rant, rather than marching into Prongs or Wormtail's rooms. The answer was rather easy: even though Moony wasn't the best person to rant to, he _was_ the best when it came to solving problems. And Sirius was in need of a problem-solver.

"Which madness are you talking about today?" Moony asked, infuriatingly calm, as he turned in his swivel chair to face Sirius.

Realising that he still clenched his hair in his fists, Sirius let go and flopped dramatically onto Remus' bed.

"Why, yes, Padfoot. _Of course,_ you can sprawl over the bed _I just made_ ," Moony muttered.

"You only just made your bed?" Sirius asked, sitting up on his elbows to look at Moony in surprise. "It's like, almost bedtime." Making one's bed was definitely a morning chore.

"Whatever," Moony mumbled. "Back to the madness at hand."

"Ah, yes," Sirius replied. "This madness. When will it end?"

Moony gave a long-suffering sigh. "What is the fucking madness, though?" He asked through gritted teeth.

Sirius couldn't help his grin. Another advantage of coming to Moony to vent was that he could annoy the shit out of his usually unflappable friend. "It's Marissa."

Moony frowned. "Remind me who Marissa is?"

Sirius sat up straight on Moony's bed, so that he could look at him better. "You know, the one who yelled at me in a very public way on our very public date?"

Moony's frown deepened. "Was this recent?" he asked.

Sirius flung his hands in the air. "It was like, two weeks ago! How can you not remember this?"

"Your romantic escapades are rather fast-paced."

Sirius rolled his eyes. It was one thing to have the entire campus thinking he was some sort of Lothario, it was quite something else when it came from one of his closest friends. "You know the one. Ridiculous family name, lives at Ravenclaw Hall, always posts gym selfies?"

"Oh! _That_ Marissa! Her Instagram's great!"

Sirius was bewildered by the turn in the conversation. "You follow Marissa Painsley-Bumbershuffle on Instagram?"

Moony nodded enthusiastically. "I especially like her smoothie recipes."

This was an even more shocking revelation. "Her… smoothie recipes," he repeated, just to make sure he'd heard his sandy-haired friend correctly. Perhaps all the stress of the situation was getting to him and he was having some sort of anxiety-fuelled break from reality.

"Yup! Nutritious and delicious! And she always uses in-season products, and shops locally –"

"I didn't even know you _had_ Instagram," Sirius muttered, interrupting the virtues of Marissa's Instagram feed. Waxing poetic about his ex-flame's social media activity was _not_ how he'd thought this conversation would go. "What else have you been hiding from me?" Sirius asked, accusatorily. Next thing he knew, Moony would be confessing to running a dog meme page on Facebook.

"I run a dog meme page on Facebook."  
Sirius' mouth fell open. He really _was_ having a break from reality.

Moony grinned. "Kidding, kidding!"

Sirius' shoulders slumped in relief, and he laughed.

"Although what other sort of meme page would a werewolf run?" Moony asked, pretending to ponder the subject deeply. "Social media aside, what is the problem with Marissa?"

Sirius sobered quickly. "This entire _thing_ is a problem! Ever since that night, my reputation has been ruined!"

"I don't see how disappointing _yet another_ woman ruins your reputation of disappointing women."

Sirius glared at Moony.

Moony blinked back at him, completely unfazed.

"That's not what I meant," Sirius bit out through gritted teeth. He _knew_ he should've gone to Wormtail. They'd be eating chocolate by now and commiserating over how harsh the dating scene on campus could be.

"Then what's this _really_ about, Padfoot?" Moony asked, crossing his arms over his chest, and leaning back in his chair, causing it to give out a faint, ominous squeal.

Sirius sighed, and flopped back onto the bed. Moony was right, of course. It had been two weeks since that ill-fated date with Marissa, and the gossip surrounding it was finally, _finally_ dying down. However, his unease over the entire debacle gave no signs of abating. First, his conversation with Millie at the post-midterms party, and then Prongs' unsolicited advice at the café, had him thinking.

"Is this about your crush on Millie?" Moony asked, when Sirius didn't reply.

"No!" Sirius yelped, shooting to an upright position once more.

Moony raised his eyebrows. "Are you sure?"

Sirius ran a frustrated hand down his face. "Fine. This is _sort of_ about my crush on Millie." Over the last few days he'd come to the realisation that there was no point hiding his feelings from his best friends – especially since there was nothing likely to _actually happen_ between the two of them. Two entire rejections, and that message was loud and clear. Despite the colossal size of his crush, Sirius still found himself feeling disappointed at this prospect.

Moony leaned forward. "What's going on?" he asked.

Sirius took a moment to gather his thoughts. "It's just something she said. I kind of got the impression that she wasn't interested in me because of my… reputation."

"This can hardly come as a surprise, Padfoot."

"You mean _you_ wouldn't date me, either?" Sirius asked dejectedly.

Moony's face softened in sympathy. "I'd… think about it."

Which was as good as a resounding no. "What does that say about the way I treat my romantic relationships?"

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. "I was under the impression that you were more into the sex than the romance." Moony shrugged. "And from what I've gathered, you're pretty clear about that."

Sirius huffed. Perhaps this was his problem. Yes, there was a part – a very _big_ part – that was all about the physical attraction when it came to his lovely neighbour, but there was an equally important part that was interested in… other things. His limited experience in the romance department meant that he didn't have the words to describe _exactly_ what those things were, but he wasn't so unattuned to his emotions that he couldn't recognise they were there.

"What am I going to _do_ , Moony?" he asked, flopping back on the bed for the third time that evening, further ruining Moony's belated efforts at daily chores.

Sirius heard the chair squeak as Moony turned back to face his desk. "Sounds pretty simple to me," he said. "You have an image problem, so you fix it."

Sirius huffed, irritated. That was all well and good, but how did one go about _doing_ that?

"I'm going to drop art," Millie announced. She and Lily were currently studying in the common room, located on the ground floor of Gryffindor Hall. With its numerous tables, comfortable couches and chairs, and a merry fire crackling away in the ostentatious fireplace, it was a perfect place to study – made all the better when one could study with friends.

Millie was rather pleased with herself. She'd come _so far_ in her friendship with Lily over just a few short weeks. Granted, Lily had done most of the hard work in building their relationship, but whatever. Habits learnt over a lifetime could not simply be put aside in a single moment.

Lily stopped muttering over her bibliography for an Alchemy assignment. Millie felt vaguely guilty about interrupting the redhead's concentration with her dramatic announcement, but to make up for it, she was going to share a handy little citation spell she'd learnt in freshman year.

"Why are you going to drop art? You love art!" Lily exclaimed, setting her pen aside.

Millie shrugged. "It's too… distracting. From more serious stuff."

Lily frowned in concern. "You have a perfect GPA, Millie."

"How do you know that?" Millie asked suspiciously. "Do you have a spy in the admin staff?"

Lily grinned. "Maybe… Or maybe, it's because everyone who receives a perfect GPA every year appears in the annual Hogwarts magazine.

"And you actually _read_ the annual Hogwarts magazine?" Millie asked, incredulous. She had a vague recollection of signing a form about release of information concerning "excellent academic achievement" all those years ago, when she'd been filling out her enrolment documentation. She'd had no idea what that actually meant. Maybe this was it.

Lily shrugged. "It's the only reading material Slughorn's office has in the bathroom." Millie didn't know what surprised her more: Slughorn keeping past editions of _Hogwarts Ethos_ in the staff bathroom, or Lily spending enough time in there to thoroughly peruse them.

Millie mentally shook herself, bringing her mind back to the matter at hand. "Well, my perfect GPA may be in mortal peril if I don't drop art."

"That seems… highly unlikely," Lily replied, looking at Millie as if she were growing an extra head. Lily being Lily, of course, she also looked deeply concerned by this development. Her eagerness to be helpful and supportive was almost a physical presence between them, across their little table. "Especially given that you're only two course credits away from a major. What's _really_ going on?"

Millie shifted uncomfortably in her couch. She should've expected this. One couldn't simply announce they were going to drop a subject more than halfway through the semester. Not without also providing a very good reason, at least. "It's – it's Rafe," Millie mumbled in an ashamed whisper.

"Rafe Scamander? The guy you have a crush on?" Lily asked, raising her eyebrows in surprise. "What's he got to do with you dropping art?"

"He's… in it."

Lily rolled her eyes. "That's ridiculous. Having your crush in your class is not a good enough reason to abandon ship."

"I'm not abandoning ship," Millie muttered mutinously. "I'm abandoning art."

This time, Lily glared at her. "This is preposterous. I'm not going to let you throw away your academic career over some _boy_."

"It's not _all_ of my academic career," Millie reasoned. "Only part of it."

At this, Lily's mouth dropped open. "I can't believe what you're saying right now. _Only part of it?_ Have you gone _mad_?"

"I think so," Millie replied miserably, pushing herself back into the comfortably suffocating embrace of her armchair. This armchair understood what she was going through. It would never let her go.

"Millie," Lily took a deep, calming breath. Millie marvelled at her patience. She was being completely irrational, she knew, but here was Lily Evans, trying to understand what the fuck was going on with her awkward turtle of a friend. "Explain this to me. Did he say something to you?"

"Say something?" Millie parroted, alarmed at the mere thought. "Most certainly not. I feel like vomiting every time he even _looks_ at me."

"That's… an extreme reaction."

Millie nodded in agreement. "In fact, I feel like vomiting every time _I_ look at him." Rafe Scamander was a work of art come to life, a demigod walking amongst mere mortals, a paragon of physical perfection –

"Is this always your reaction when it comes to crushes?" Lily asked, looking less disgusted and more curious than Millie had expected. She'd been sure that the whole vomit thing would've put her off. It turned out, not even anxiety-fuelled vomit could deter Lily Evans. She was truly indomitable.

"Yes and no," Millie replied, pulling her knees to her chest, and wrapping her arms around them, hugging them close. "I usually admire them from afar, like I'm doing now, so the nausea is kept to a minimum. But it's never been like this." She'd never felt infatuation as sudden and powerful at this. Quite frankly, it scared the shit out of her, which was a large component of the whole nausea-on-sight thing.

"I suppose talking with him would be too much?" Lily was eyeing her critically, like a Potions experiment.

"Obviously."

"Hmm," Lily hummed thoughtfully. They lapsed into silence for a few moments. From what Millie could tell, Lily was in deep thought. "I still don't think dropping art is the solution." Lily mused. "What's _really_ the problem here?"

Millie wasn't sure if she were asking her, or simply posing the question to the air between them, like what she imagined scientists and engineers did when they brainstormed. _We can't build a reusable rocket. What's_ really _the problem here?_ She answered anyway. "It's… I don't know how to… how to do the whole relationship thing." Yes, yes; it was the age-old, deeply human problem of romance. She didn't even know where to begin, which came as no surprise. Until a few weeks ago, the closest relationship she'd had had been floating somewhere between 'friend' and 'acquaintance'. And even then, it had taken Lily's determination to change its trajectory.

Sometimes Millie wondered where the line between being alone and being lonely was. Other times, she wondered if she'd crossed it already and was too far lost in her habits to notice.

Lily's heart broke for her friend. Sitting across from her, looking as if she wanted the armchair swallow her forever, Millie White looked lonelier than she'd ever seen. Over the past few weeks, her suspicions of Millie's deeply introverted lifestyle had been confirmed, but she'd never thought that it made her _unhappy_. No, the strong impression Lily had gotten was that the whole hermit thing was a choice.

But she supposed every choice had the potential to become a burden.

As Millie avoided her gaze, staring fastidiously at their forgotten homework instead, Lily got up and walked over to her. She squeezed herself next to her, and gave her friend a hug. She had no idea where to begin, but there had only been a rare few occasions when a hug hadn't helped in a seemingly dire situation.

"You don't need a romantic relationship to complete you," Lily murmured, gently stroking Millie's hair. It was a testament to the emotional turmoil this crush on Rafe Scamander was causing, because not only did Millie not push away her overtures of comfort, but in fact _leaned in_ towards her.

"I know," Millie whispered back. "But it would be… nice, you know?"

Lily sighed. "I know. But it doesn't mean you have to rush into things."

Millie lifted her head from where she'd been resting it on her shoulder. "I think my problem is that I'm rushing _away_. I just don't have the framework for this."

Lily smiled warmly at her friend. She may not be able to fix all her anxieties right now, but perhaps she could plant the seed that would eventually lead her there. She knew she was mixing up her figures of speech, but the sentiment was not misplaced, so she didn't really care. "Millie," she began gently, yet still being firm. Lily didn't pity her, and she didn't want Millie thinking that she did. Far from it, she thought it was brave of her to voice a fear that many of them held deep in their hearts. "Like everything else, knowing how to do romance is learned. It doesn't happen overnight. You meet someone you like. You say the wrong thing, and it all fizzles. Oh, well. You meet someone else, and sparks fly, but three months in, it turns out you can't compromise on moving halfway across the country. Oh, well. You meet the first person again, and _this_ time, you're readier – and things work out. But then something happens, and it turns out you have to learn how to do it all over again."

Lily wasn't sure she was even making any sense, but the way Millie was looking at her, with that characteristic unnerving intensity, maybe _something_ had clicked.

"So, do you think… I should be practicing?" Millie asked. Lily was glad to hear the dejectedness leaving her voice. God, she hoped never to hear _that_ particular emotion from her friend ever again.

Lily laughed, nudging Millie a little to give her more room on the armchair. Millie obliged, wiggling away enough that both their butts were now being squished uncomfortably. But Lily didn't mind. It was all part of the deep-and-meaningful-conversation experience. "Maybe…" she waggled her eyebrows suggestively. "You know you want to _practice_ with Rafe."

"Oh, my God! Not like that!" Millie gasped, but the effect was ruined by her own laughter. "I cannot believe you're suggesting I _practice_ with Rafe when I can't even speak to him."

Lily giggled. She didn't think sex was the solution here, but at least it had broken the tension, made Millie laugh again. "You could ask him to pose for a portrait. A _naked_ portrait."

"You're unbelievable!" Millie replied, trying to look scandalised. The effect was somewhat ruined by her continuing chuckles.

"Or…" Lily looked around the common room, seeing if there was someone else she could _suggest_. To Lily's utter surprise, none other than Sirius Black walked into the room at that very moment, looking uncharacteristically deep in thought. She looked on as Black's gaze swept over the room, and landed on Millie, as if it had been drawn to her of its own volition. His eyes sharpened, and he took half a step towards them, before he noticed Lily's own narrowed gaze trained upon him. She didn't know what was going on between the two of them, but tonight was the not the night to find out.

Black had the audacity to grin at Lily's reaction. He raised his hands, either to placate her or indicate surrender, she wasn't sure. With a wink, he changed his course away from them.

All of this happened without Millie any the wiser. "Or?" she prompted, jolting Lily's thoughts away from any nefarious deeds Sirius Black may have been planning.

"Or…" Lily's lips curved into a sly smirk, her eyes still following Black's back as he headed to an armchair on the far side of the common room. "You could _practice_ with Sirius Black."

The guffaws that spilled forth from Millie clearly indicated how absurd she thought that suggestion was.

But as the evening wore on, and Black's attention kept wandering in their vicinity, Lily wondered how absurd _Black_ thought that suggestion would be.

 **AN: Hey friends! Welcome to chapter 6! It's been who knows how long! (Not me!) Hope you enjoyed this chapter, filled with *emotions* and *character development* and *probably too many points of view*. Let me know what you thought! All feedback is welcome – the good, the bad, the ugly!**

 **Adios, amigos! :D**


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